S.

Sunday, May 24, 2009,12:58 PM

don't worry about me now.

Danny told me advertise, so here...

http://www.zshare.net/audio/6039782394297649/

Raedelz & Xyst - Lights Low

Listen, it's so live. LOL mhmm. That sounded
off, but bare with me. : )

Well I'm on my way to the LAST day of Carassauga,
and I must admit, I really will miss it again :(.
I love dancing Hawaiian every year. I'm so use to
it. It's like my what, 8th year ? Next year my 9th.
: ) I love it. Yeup. Well I would like to say another
thaaank you to my friends who came down to visit me
and watch me dance yesterday. You know who you are.
Well, I'm glad you guys came to support. : D. Anywho,
yesterday was really good. Our performances went really
well. My group does 3 dances. One ancient hula dance,
one polynesian dance, and one tahitian dance. My favourite
is the tahitian one. The polynesian one only has one
extra costume left, so Stacey & Hazel & I rotate while
doing that dance. Omg, I hate it because I don't know
how to do the ending well. We have to say some next
chant thing or whatever, it's weird. LOL. The first
one I like because I don't have to smile. LMAO : P
Anywho, I was kind of pissed off yesterday just because,
but yeahh. I'm fine now. All my friends say it's not
worth it, so I guess I'll be fine. I don't need that
in my life. But yeah, on another note, me and Andrew
are okay now. I just made peace with him just because
life's too short to hold on to grudges. I never
really realized how he's a somewhat a man enough to try
and make things okay with me. But I guess, yeah. Sorry for
jumping back and forth with topics... lol. So yesterday last night,
I stayed on the phone with Sammy Villanueva & Johnny De Guzman.
LOL, yeah I intro'd them via phone. It was a nice convo.
We all talked till like 2 alomst 3AM. I love Sam and John.
They're both so cool. Sammy and I are planning to go to L.A.
after Graduation. : ) Yay, so we seriously neeeeed to save up.
While I promised John once I start driving (hopefully), I'd
go to his area just to see him ? LOL. First mission, probably
gonna be a fail.. but let's hope not. Mhhm. I felt nice introing
Kevin & RJ yesterday. Rj practically stayed at the Hawaiian
pavilion till the fucking end, and now he feels like joining.
LMAO ! Wooow. Kevin's so gay, he kept telling about how he
calls our group the "tribe" LMAO. In other words, he also
kind of cheered me up when we went outside. While I threw
away my alcoholic pina colada and ripped off half the grass
off the ground and so forth. But yes, thanks for baring with me
Kevin. : ) lol Yeuuh, well I'm about to leave soon, so I guess
I'll get back to this later. I think I'll be okay. I'm fine.
I've got better people in my life to make me feel happy, not
the negative people that make me feel stupid. K bye.

Labels: advertising, carassauga, LOL

Friday, May 22, 2009,5:35 PM

half a vent, because I'm nervous.

I'm sitting here, about to take the stand.. (8)
Yes, that Jackie Boys song is still stuck in my head. Lol, yeup.
Carassauga's tonight and I guess I'm very excited. But at the same
time I'm like FML, its today and I don't wanna screw up, and especially
since I'm in the front corner too... -__- Grace (one of the teachers)
put me there since I'm short, sooo life sucks. Yet, in all honesty.. I
probably have more pressure being added to my mind. I don't even know why
I'm so nervous this year. I don't even know if it's cause I feel kinda
sad in my heart, or because I'm nervous I have 3 dances to do this year.
Probably both, and I guess the heart part is kind of adding pressure to
myself. Why do I feel this way ?.. Hm, I wouldn't say that I'm heartbroken.
I think I feel "heart-dented" LMAO, yeah.. Technically, it's been damaged
before and it just got a little big dent on it again. Whatever, I know I'll
be okay.. I guess. Sure, I'm sad, I'm upset, of course I miss him. But
what can I do ? Nada. But one thing's for sure, I know that I'm a smart
girl, and I should do what's best for myself for once in my life. I
shouldn't let people or things ever walk over me like I'm a sidewalk.
No. Never. I've been neglected and mistreated by so many other people
in my past, and I think I should stop letting my guard down. I feel for
the first time in my life, I'm learning to pick myself up again alone
without anyone helping me, basically no tears, no pain, just dissapointment.
I think I'll be okay. This will past. Everyone goes through hard times,
but I guess life goes on in the end right ?

Labels: carassauga, fucking nervous, idk

Thursday, May 21, 2009,11:45 PM

Carassauga changes ?

Uhh yeah, well right now I guess I'm writing here to confirm
what's really going on in my pavilion, especially to my lovely
friends coming to watch me.. Yeah, so, my pavilion ISN'T and
apparantly never was going to be in Mississauga Valleys.. It's
back to same old Huron Park which is near St. Martins, which is
bogus because its SOOOOOOO far. But anywho, please try making it.
And most of all, I'm so so so sad that we're not doing chicken
this year.. (btw chicken is a dance) : [ ! So upsetting ! But
instead were doing 3-4 dances ? One is fan, which also like chicken,
but with fans. Lmao, yeaaauh. Oh btw people who I sold the tickets
to, please make sure you still HAVE them because when you're at
the door, you get your passport that way (y). Alrighty, ummmm
I guess that's all I've got to say. I'm very tired and exausted
from practise today..... and yeah, goodbye.

Labels: carassauga, hawaii, SO tiring